Fake Tits

For the ones among you guys, there's probably some fans of big donkers, regardless if they're real or fake. Be warned - the babes you are about to encounter in this section have, without exception, augmented boobs (mostly enhanced with silicone). Being a major turn-on for many of you out there, SexVid has decided to create a special category featuring sluts with fake tits, who have a home advantage in porn disciplines like titjobs or cum on boobs. Be sure to check it out when you can!

fake tits

There are, it seems, many words for the real deals: melons, jugs, hooters, tits, titties, cans, the girls, rack, knockers, fried eggs, tatas, bosoms, bazookas, bazingas, bazongas, ninnies, grenades, guns, pillows, boom booms, Grand Tetons, dirty pillows, gazongas, tittyboppers, love monkeys, funbags, balloons, bam bams, milk jugs, milkshakes, the twins, tee-tees, cha-chas, chi-chis, chesticles, coconuts, Sacco and Vanzetti, Simon and Garfunkel, Larry and Balki, Bonnie and Clyde, Starsky and Hutch, Lucy and Ethel, Cheech and Chong, Laverne and Shirley, Wayne and Garth, Bill and Ted, goodyears, lemons, limes, bongos, flea bites, double lattes, Hindenburgs, Golden Globes, Oprah Winfreys, Lois Lanes, sweater-stretchers, lady bubbles, smothers brothers, Liberty Bells, park-and-rides, baby busters, silver dollars, little rascals, milk duds, bouncy castles, twin peaks, baby buffets, jingle bells, shoulder boulders, honey hams, samosas, kahunas, bubbies, bumpers, boobs, breasts . . .

While the English language delights to name and rename breasts, no existing monikers quite get at the nature of fake ones. You wonder what euphemisms might work and start to come up with a list of contenders: Young Frankensteins, Anne Boleyns, Headless Horsemen, loose marbles, lost cats, spare pair, boob tubes, second servings, wrecking balls, tittish patients, removable feasts, titroids, titcoins, odd balls, mystery guests, silicone valleys, foreign agents, unknown soldiers, mulligans, Scarborough fairs, beverly hills, manufactured goodies, second wives, moon bounces, plastic bottles, new balances, perfect strangers . . .

You have become increasingly perplexed with the cultural distinctions made between fake boobs for enhancement and fake boobs for reconstruction. After all, if you draw a Venn diagram to illustrate the similarities, the circles overlap considerably. The justifications are certainly alike: vanity, beauty standards, a desire to feel good about oneself. The same goes for the downsides: loss of sensation, inability to nurse, leakage, rupture. But mostly the fact of the matter itself remains the same: plastic implanted in a body.

In a new Hollywood Reporter profile about the star, journalist Mikey O'Connell writes that "Rossum got blisters from the fake breasts and suffered tear duct issues from wearing two pairs of contact lenses and from the oppressive eye makeup during the shoot."

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